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Nine Spirits or nineteen spirit

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    my ninth album and eleventh release! it's about being nineteen and me me

    that's the cover! ->
    credit: sarah winters(<3)/danny collins

    thank you and love you dave and jenna and dave!

    and.will.you[at]gmail[dot]com

    http://www.youtube.com/user/tenderdiscovery

    contact at 'and.will.you[at]gmail[dot]com'

    here are my first six albums!:

    Étape Un! (My Me, Your Me) (5/24/08)

    www.mediafire.com?lvuwjndkna2

    Stage II (7/13/08)

    www.mediafire.com?mzymzdwb2mz

    THREE: Super Us! (12/25/08)

    www.mediafire.com?zzuxk0d2mim

    Working Under Dreams (5/24/09)

    www.mediafire.com?xzmynmmwyql

    Summer (8/3/09)

    www.mediafire.com?2tdzmy0jjdy

    Blue Walls (12/27/09)

    www.mediafire.com?mowznznnky2

    here is my first EP, Wollege (9/19/09)!:

    www.mediafire.com?bhfaz3imzam

    here is my mixtape Special Moves (4/10/10)!:

    www.mediafire.com?ylkzdtuynzf

    but for now, enjoy the pride and joy of my complete works-to-date: nineteen spirit 2! it's weird!

    the download of my second collection of poetry "heaventeen, greateen, fineteen: ascension! :)" is included! and don't FORGET you can download my first (much longer) collection of poetry "heaventeen, greateen, fineteen: graduation" with the dl of my seventh album, "heaventeen, greateen, fineteen: campaign mode"!

    snake eater, an EP of outtakes/special live performances is available now as well!


    my tenth album, tender discovery, is in the works!

    here is the first volume of sights from the tender discovery project (in collaboration with sarah winters)!

    www.mediafire.com?6qqy5vgpw9y1pt5

    thank you for visiting!
    ... more
    Purchasable with gift card

     

1.
I: ((nineteen spirit)) i got the nineteen spirit i'm taking off my shoes i'm changing all my clothes i'm kissing all my friends i got the nineteen spirit i'm changing all my shoes i'm taking off my clothes re-finding all my friends no one speaks the language of my love, like you no one speaks the language of my failure, like you no one speaks the language of my futures, like you and it's reaching all around it's reaching all around?! (YEAH) tonight today will you run this brush with me? will you trust in your legs and my heart? my friend pat doesn't wanna go bald i don't wanna go bald neither pat's been taking formulas he found on television i've been talking shit and wishing hard tonight today won't you run through this brush with me? won't you trust in my legs and your heart? II: alex alex you are a series of my favorite images a pyroclastic flow of tries and heart and hurt i love you with the essence of adolesence still deep with in our flesh and a vigor for cleansing rigor compelling all our eras you are a lover planting wherever you go i am a student watching for whenever you grow alex, it you can do belief of mine it is in you you are my nigga my fucking brother and i need that for the nights when my eyes are swollen shut by the blackest kind of feedback for the nights when eyes flower wide and distance is semantic our tongues are a secret weapon for decay death and bad shit alex, it you can do belief of mine it is in you and there is plethoras of promises sending/receiving from both our lips; pledges in bodies and silences breaking and women and indian prayers gender and action genuine anger family and crawling and what makes you lie daley and police and failing adults shaking and laughing and all that we won't ("...the feelings of a real life emotional teenager then you think again") alex, it you can do belief of mine it is in you but i love that we're here and i love that we're now i love that we fear and cover our mouths and i love that we fight with all open palms and are wrong and are wrong and are wrong and are wrong alex, it you can do belief of mine it is in you III: no fear ("pass the peas like they used to do") IV: into the void "talking to myself all the way to the station pictures in my head of the final destination"
2.
ojalá 05:00
music to get down to to kiss another girl in the sun for the first time to to ring up your boyfriend and tell him truth and have you both grow as ones and two music to break down to to make a mad dash for your father's roof with your head tucked and your lucky tooth roots and fruits: uneasy truce music to break through to live fast die young is doodoo fast enough can be my life so when i die it'll be as light i'm a tumbling ball so excuse my room i'ma find my condoms and find my shoes anything that's lost is a footstep back i will not make excuses i will just adapt change my diction go pro-black embrace friction as foreplay for synthesis gifted is impetus not a crutch and kissing is privlege and much can be gained when pragmatics meet orgasms and bodies don't feel strange music to sit through to when a lost friend says "i miss you too" and said friend is the one that left and who omits and never guesses music to sit up to your body of work is getting so strong cuz you know your worth and you care for true and those two things are not exclusive music to stand up to when them niggas try to touch you with their smirks and grunts and unused consciouses covered by beats unh rapping is the sweetest but my home is now the overlord the bonds and rape and master's gaze complicit city! tell you more?! denial! shame! men in charge! bodyguards and also writers no shit you don't mind this empire your bodies aren't the ones on fire THE MOVEMENT IS SELF-MUTILATING ("what do you want?") i wanna be rad and radical bad as fuck goob boy and a good world finding our touch no fear, just weird no fear, just weird! ("i know i'll be in the air") ("what do you want?") i wanna be bad and badical rad as fuck goob boy in a good world finding its touch no fear, just weird no fear, just weird! ("i know i'll be in the air") i wanna party like i'm nineteen and never feel anxious like my dick is always awesome and never ever dangerous i wish you'd believe me malcolm nina and baldwin told me kanye j lo nicki showed me if i continue to grow me i will find i'll be chosen i wish you'd believe me history's gonna turn its giant red eye toward you and burn your fucking face off history's gonna turn its tiny white eye towards you and look right through, tearless i wish you'd believe me so rap if it's your friends or mine i will slice your face with mines carve two letters for kids to find right before they cannibalize i wish you'd believe me i saw my water light up in my hands so i walked to the ocean to test my mettle
3.
4.
there's a man in a car with his wife two men in the front seat stopped at a light the two other men are his brother and his friend the man grabs the door and tries to jump out again everybody all yells and struggle ensues something long the lines of "I'm trying to help you" something long the lines of "I DON'T NEED SHIT" the man's pulled back and the driver hits it when i was six i decided tattoos weren't for me cuz when i hit twenty five i'd split from my life in the Chi and just wear all white in the desert i'm staring at the words on your back realizing that i still feel like that my arms are shaking and my mouth is running and i can't tell no more where the words are landing x i will let you my lock my doors i've thrashed against the hoofprints and i'm so tired of that shit cuz all i want ya all i want ya all i want i want is just to dance and sing (badly) x the man has a son who pretty often hears stories like that one where his dad is a manic addict saddled with a burden unmanageable a basketball prodigy married to his high school sweetheart where did the shift down start? and how did that start shift down? will the ghost come touch me now? 'round fifteen i wouldn't touch a drink cuz everything i knew always made me think that a liquid beat'd be the end of me and now i do it nightly and i gotta lot of friends who felt the same as me but i'm a college kid swathed in artistry i just said "swathed" i'm an artist, b! i'm a NIGGA i'm a kid with hardest deepest beliefs set from the get locked in from dreams and the higher i get the more the memories speak to me spiritually am i fulfilling a PROOOOPHECY? i truly believe i could be! but i could be craaazy i am so lazy when it comes to anything but making beats and making LOVE if i get i want what will it ask for in return mom's already concerned might be mom shit but if anyone'd know it's my mom this is my PLEA!: don't stopstop loving me cuz my Me still thinks he's three and we can't trust that nigga can we? x i will let you my lock my doors i've thrashed against the hoofprints and i'm so tired of that shit cuz all i want ya all i want ya all i want i want is just to dance and sing (badly) x ("strange things keep happening") this is my blood i got the power to change everything ("like an old, baby again") this is my blood
5.
lotta inboxes you'd rather seem hateful than gay that's weird! racing eternity lakitu onscreen first grade: this nigga was gay everybody knew it and everybody'd say it every bathroom trip was a "guard yr dick 'fore that fuckin fruitcup gets a hold of it!" his name was... well, he knows his name even if we never mention our game i'd line up behind when we left the class and get way up on The Gay Kid's ass and we'd touch and nobody'd know one rose hand and somebody'd go to bathroom and about two minutes after the other would join him we were the masters of mutual masturb- nevermind. fast forward about fifteen years: me and that bro still throw back beers and No, hell no, is my smoking bro queer! i wonder where it went for him de-selected or re-directed the pose i wonder what it meant to him when i screamed him a faggot but then close... but then close... close... pause. I got my Secret Gay on for too long to let some fuck shit like this go on I know the lame things that I did as a kid to try to keep my own proclivities hid flex, you're forty kanye is thirty y'all grown as fuck and y'all still feeling dirty when a dick comes up like if you don't buck as hard as you can then you can't be a man but here's the good news you're gonna die soon! but not soon enough! there's so much time to stop being silly and man the fuck up and we're all gonna get there and it's gonna be great! with a bunch of cool dads touching on dicks and still being straight! [ed: or whatever] yeah! you know who you is it doesn't look like you know who you is it doesn't look like (some people don't) racing eternity lakitu onscreen
6.
7.
you never answer anything without taking a step back into yourself you only feel something when somebody e is mad at you and that only pushes you further and further back cuz you knew that they were waiting knew that they were waiting up you knew that they were waiting you knew that they were waiting but you never really intended to come come back did you i wonder if they knew that i wonder if they know that i have a feeling i have a feeling, about this the only reason you told me shit is cuz you consider me harmless cuz i'm not trying to fuck you you sprinkle all your loneliness like breadcrumbs across bedding like you're trying to get back to something you were crying from numbness it's dumb shit we're young kids there's nothing that serious but i have a feeling i have a feeling, about this and i've got a feeling that i'll always have that feeling (it's a fucked up feeling) you never answer anything without taking a step back into yourself i am not who you wanted but this is what i've earned and i hope i can be good for you but then my hands start to break as your gaze does the same and you don't look like you recognize me as the friend who you texted to go get coffee on tuesday and i don't recognize the loosed soft madness in your voice an infantilized ghoul writhes and coos in my arms and bucks against my hips, a personal baggage claim erupting. my softly drooling penis. my true colors pinning yours to the floor, my voice dropping dog as your raises into infancy this you on my mouth has glazed over is sleepwalking and sleeptalking d d dirty and in the dark i am another nightmare glowing peppered across your insomnia another softly drooling conniving another tilted down smirk broken up by lumbered pants i put my hand in your hair ((i mumble))
8.
waltz #5 03:36
may the monsters that came between us be crossboned into the sea ("i lit a match and watched it throw shadows while you grew a hell on the top of our kingdoms") i could write our whole epitaph in misheard lyrics and line graphs that jerk their way straight into the ground i'm sorry, love i don't want to be found will you ever kiss me again ask me what my middle name is text me in the early morning sing with me in early morning one day i'll look at you like i don't know you because i won't because i won't one day i'll look at you like i don't know you because i won't because i won't ((or may the monsters that came between us be crossboned into the sea.))
9.
your ex-husband has a girlfriend now you kept his last name and the house when the child that kept you in your home is still the same anchor but grown he is your 50s a satellite who decides when to do things right who you told to face that he had changed got difficult, and turned strange dad, you'd rather heart beat faster than deeper mama's alone she's stripped til the bones of her nascently grown hopes sing the crack of her family's home i'll conquer this road and come back as your own arrythmia (i had a dream about you guys last night)

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released April 1, 2011

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+ Chicago, Illinois

you can watch +'s video for "jihad" here:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=XvRPwho22ys

it's from + 's fourteenth album

my fourteenth album is called "i'm starting to believe" and was released 7/24/2014

i'm here
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