"if i had an orchard, i'd work until i'm sore"

you can pretend i'm who you want and i can pretend i'm them too we can close our eyes and hope these hooks in the back of our brains to tug a little bit softer i'll fuck up quite often but i will always stay true and i won't regret a goddamn thing cuz i'll know it's the best i could do there's not much i could ask of you there's so much i would wish of you i'll just fasten my nose to the grindstone til i can make do it what it do: i'll block out the wayward glances focus in on fanning chances till they burst like a bruise:: my fire statue!::: i will mold it with my hands and then spread it with each dance that i'm refining in my room cut my way up from a gloom that had ivied over my legs i got a restless tongue, don't you know? [/that's] born to unwind all this vex fitness debt craft sex next [i gotta get this out my chest] i think i'm howard roark harry potter what would buffy do? go harder go farther go in go in go in! i think i'm kanye west shawn carter what would nicki do? go farther. go harder. go in go in go in! [you know you've got nothing to do but duck down in this stream and carve your voice the white will find its way just keep your hands moving as honest as you Can]

for sky for the blue when the ghosts are hungry will you breathe out a thought at all? when our lives aren't touching for a while will the meaning fall? should i not expect a call?

(gain strength from the light like kal-el) but Glitterfaced Ponderer of Gender is my super hero name [UNGH] (at least three of my heroes know my name) one is at my side or in my mind at ti imes (i'm a good son, i'm really doing fine) i really do alright (my parents know i love them and my heart is in the right) if your heart is in the right place say yeah (yeah) (already back in bed, burping smoke out my nose) weathering a complex, staying most out my clothes (staying more out my clothes, liking more of my clothes) getting compliments on more of my clothes! (crying at britney spears and buffy) kissing her shoulders really early (lift every night at 2:40, then make some cool shit and watch buffy younger new twincharger whose seeds have set to barking: holster your bravado and be more brave, be auto auto with your pushing auto when yr nigga need money for a fish taco especially if he could outrap you on your own damn track boy goddess bless you (my name now refers to a spirit) i divorce it from the old testament (reason, faith, and heart) may they carry me through to the end (realest nigga's real talk) real niggas don't talk 'i won't get to rest if you don't get to rest' i could write our whole revival 'i won't get to rest if you don't get to rest' in misheard lyrics and scriptures, that point straight into the clouds it's all automatic when i do it! that's why i can't stop this self-mythologizing: [Blood Meridian::] motherunfucker inscribed on his knuckles as young teen rubbin nuts off to the Rubbles fuckin in chat rooms, addict computer weird fucking kid, no friends from school or that are even black close ears about that run late to school run home after that with the GDs at your back and the white kids on your mind looking for some hand-shaped clouds so you can find somewhere you can land with a mouth wide open find the malcolm x break the world open remember cheetos in the summer laser disc with dad bad boys blade runner aliens dumb & dumber even though th that's your grades thaddon't mean that that's your fate catapault from faith kiss the dirt splash your face close your eyes somewhere that you've never been before and stick to the greens like you herbivore, Kid and when me and the boys went out we killed, a thousand, butterflies "so i put their wings into my mouth and said a prayer for our safe arrival" a lil behavior modification never hurt nobody meaning there's a chip in my brain and i can't hurt nobody craft every song into a wonderful leviathan and board a love train with that angry nigga ty and them and play board games with the demons that be tying them tryna read death's mind somewhat bill and ted do everything manually labor under dread

'there was a white girl high on xanax drunk out of her mind hooked her arm in mine and decided she wanted to spill her mind told me the difference between me and a nigger and a nigga and it made as much sense to me as whenever I witness dudes defending their usage of bxxxh like "there's Women and there's Them" there's shelters and statistics that show you're full of privlege I mean you're full of shit housewife housenigga i don't mind dick, but that don't mean i'm a faggot- i'm just confused, pops' 'i said i'm tired of these white girls looking at me like i look at all the other black boys' i used to say 'i'm tired of all these white girls looking at me like i look at all the other black boys' i'm in the noose so like ("your cell phone, i'm complex.") i'm in your boss so like ("your cell phone, i'm complex.") i'm in your glance so like ("your cell phone, i'm complex.") i'm in your hands so like ("your cell phone, i'm complex.") i'm in your home so like ("your cell phone, i'm complex.") i'm in your bones so like ("your cell phone, i'm complex.") i'm in your jokes so like ("your cell phone, i'm complex.") i'm in your hopes ('i know, i know...it's too late...') 'i know, i know you didn't mean it' ('i know, i know...it's too late...') i know, i know you're not racist ('i know, i know...it's too late...') i know you have friends and cousins that are gay ('i know, i know...it's too late...') i know she decided to have sex with you anyway i'm in your self like ("your cell phone, i'm complex.") i'm at your self so like ("your cell phone, i'm complex.") i'm at your self so like ("your cell phone, i'm complex.") i'm in your health so like ("your cell phone, i'm complex.") what i'm talkin bout y'all it's RACISM

'your face is at the top of my mountain' you are my colors you are my colors you said you coulda almost made that line be the words that were on your back you said but that's crazy i'd say fine, i'll reciprocate you back it's the 2.0 two turbo of everything we been through it's the sequel in the sequel you can break all kinds of rules! our parents told us stories (UNGH) to make our bruises feel better (UNGH) i bet they're smiling now do you think they think we're better? better than their 80s better at what we keep i think their belief is deep that is much of a sign to me! there is never a time where we don't live far as fuck from each other two time zones or hours we've turned ourselves around so this has gotta be a revolution 'your face your face is at the top of my mountain' it's awesome it's such a vivrant thing that we got no Hype no skips no sides no playing but playing and lots and lots of playing! and lots and lots of FUN cuz girl you are the only one and we are the only two you are the only you and i am only i when you are lying by my ssssssss (i'd ride...) you are swinging from the spines of all my best dreams you are the bomb, you have thoroughly impressed me!! (side ride...) [the queenfisher comes down or the rapture or End of Days or End of Our Warm Ways]

when you see the Sun hung up in the sky his preferred family circling his throne they don't know the blood coating his crown; the darkest brown, your mothers when i rip your heart out it won't be for me when i rip your heart out it won't set me free but there are ghosts but there are ghosts but there are ghosts but there are ghosts when i rip your heart out it won't be for me when i rip your heart out it won't set me free but there are ghosts

so i'm liking this dominance the breathing and the tightened wrists so i'm liking this submission when we wind in the same direction so i'm liking your permission and i'm loving the third time like even more than the first so i tighten we jynx each other we jynx each other we jynx each other hey ah i i love you boy i love you girl so (...) for when i wanna hold your hand

tender discovery wonder &ambiguity