you never answer anything
without taking a step back into yourself

you only feel
something when somebody e
is mad at you
and that only
pushes you further and further
back cuz you

knew that they were waiting
knew that they were waiting up
you knew that they were waiting
you knew that they were waiting but

you never really intended to come come back did you

i wonder if they knew that
i wonder if they know that

i have a feeling
i have a feeling, about this

the only reason you told me shit
is cuz you consider me harmless

cuz i'm not trying to fuck you
you sprinkle all your loneliness

like breadcrumbs
across bedding

like you're trying to get back to something

you were crying from numbness

it's dumb shit

we're young kids

there's nothing
that serious

but i have a feeling
i have a feeling, about this

and i've got a feeling
that i'll always have that feeling

(it's a fucked up feeling)

you never answer anything
without taking a step back into yourself

i am not who you wanted
but this is what i've earned
and i hope
i can be good
for you

but then my hands start to break
as your gaze does the same

and you don't look like you recognize me
as the friend who you texted to go get coffee on tuesday
and i don't recognize the loosed soft madness in your voice

an infantilized ghoul writhes and coos in my arms and bucks against my hips,
a personal baggage claim erupting. my softly drooling penis. my true colors
pinning yours to the floor, my voice dropping dog as your raises into infancy

this you
on my mouth
has glazed over
is sleepwalking
and sleeptalking d d dirty
and in the dark i am another nightmare
glowing peppered across your insomnia

another
softly
drooling
conniving

another tilted down smirk broken up by lumbered pants

i put my hand in your hair
((i mumble))